Tag Archives: light

Clean up yuck duty!

My baby turned two this month and he is a gorgeous child (hey I am his mother), and all that comes with a two year old has now emerged. That does sound ominous. He is now insisting that he does everything on his own and has no problem saying the word “No”. So he gets food and drink everywhere and I mean absolutely everywhere.

He is climbing, well everything. And with that comes the inevitable falling over. I must admit he hardly ever cries, he just keeps getting up and soldiering on. He has a wonderful personality and is always on the move. He certainly knows how to tire people out.

Today he is unwell, a high fever set in yesterday and he has thrown up a few times since then. So apart from being ‘nurse mummy’ and giving lots of kisses and cuddles, I am also administering medicine, lots of water and on clean up yuck duty. 🙂

I believe it is due to teething. His back molars are coming in and this can be quite painful at times. He may also have a slight cold. It is amazing how young children can be ill one moment and recover so quickly the next. This is my third child and so I am not panicking about the high temperature, unless it gets out of hand. He is handling things quite well and is still smiling.

He brings me no end of happiness and joy. I love the role of being a mother. However, I know that does not define me. It is only a part of who I am. An extremely important and loving part of me. It does tend to take over and I then have to put other areas of my life on hold. I do not regret this as children grow up so fast. I stayed home from work today to care for him. My family is my priority and keeping a job to take care of him is a priority also. So it is difficult at times to juggle all of it. My life is in a constant state of change, one moment of experience moves into another and I have to roll with it. So being flexible is a great tool to have. Patience is a virtue. So they say.

I want my children to know that they are loved and have a safe place to call home. I am grateful that I can provide that. I am so grateful that we are all healthy, even if we get ill and that we have food on the table and a roof over our heads. It is more than many people get to see.

Sending out love, light and healing to you all. Especially sending out loving thoughts to those in need right now.

Nothing is forever

Sitting in front of the computer tonight listening to the wind howling outside. It is strong enough to rattle the window panes. Makes it kind of hard to think straight. I have made some major life changes recently and I have to say that it is as messy as I thought it would be. My emotions have been up and down like a roller coaster ride. But at least I am feeling them. They come, I feel them and then they pass. There were many years of my young life where I felt nothing at all just so I could survive each day. Nothing is forever. The changes are necessary. One of my new years resolutions was to remove people from my life that were negative, holding me back or just plain disrespecting or hurting me. Needless to say this is causing major upheavals in my life as some of those people are family. You don’t get to choose your family, but you do get to choose if you want to hang with them. It is sad. But it is necessary.

I am a good person and I am following my own spiritual path. This path is one where I can connect with others in a positive way. Spread the love so to speak 🙂 The recordings that I hear over and over from my youth are starting to fade. I am worthy. I am loved. Tonight I am sending out love, light and healing to all those people who need it. Blessings.

 

I wouldn’t have it any other way

I have been absent from the blogesphere for a while. I have been dealing with a personal crisis that has subsided for now anyway. One thing I have noticed is how life goes on – no matter what is happening around you. I still had to look after the family. I still had to work two jobs. I had to contend with the everyday running of the household. I had to put up a front to my children as I did not want to worry them. I lost sleep. I became ill as I was run down. But life still had to go on. How many of us do this everyday?  It helped knowing that my problems were not so bad and that there are others dealing with much more than I – this put things into perspective. It helped to know that this will pass and things will get better. I know that. Meditation has become all the more important as I contend with a crook neck due to the stress. I have been trying to focus on the children and the joy that they can bring. I have been spending time with my family and friends. But something had to give and that was my writing. It is very difficult to get into the right head space to be creative when you are feeling overwhelmed with life. I am back. How I miss using my creative outlet. It feels like I have lost a part of me when I am away.

My little boy is nearly two and I have been really enjoying watching him learn to speak. He certainly knows how to make himself understood even if he doesn’t know all the words yet 🙂 My eldest is learning how to drive – what fun that is. The kids are on school holidays so there goes any assemblance of routine for two weeks 🙂 I am just so happy that we are all together, happy and healthy. What more can I ask for. I am so grateful. My house is certainly lived in and life is not perfect – I wouldn’t have it any other way. Sending out love and light to everyone.

We are people too and we do not have super powers

For all of those single mothers out there, in fact for every parent out there…..This is a message for you. Remember to take the time that you need to take care of yourself. We are so used to putting everyone else first that we often forget about our needs. Don’t let it go. What is the point of getting run down and becoming ill, that leads to being unable to take of your family. I have had a big reminder of this lately and tonight I am sending out love, light and healing to all those people who need it right now. We are people too and we do not have super powers. Although sometimes we wish we did 🙂

My heart is full

It is amazing what you can fit into one day. Albeit my only day off. But as a mother you don’t get any time off 🙂 Dropped one child off to school, attended some appointments and then took my baby to swimming lessons. It is only his third one, but he is already so confident he wants to go off without me. It brings me so much joy to share this experience with him.  Then it was home for lunch and a nap – for the baby, not me! The little prince decided to remove his nappy and relieved himself all over his cot. Oh the joys of motherhood. Had to strip the bed and wash everything. Then two more appointments all with baby in tow. So many times that I had to pull the stroller out of the car and put it back in and the baby too. I am getting muscles on my muscles 🙂 Then off home to put dinner on.  Followed by bath time. Playing with blocks and chatting with my little boy before I put him to bed. One of the highlights of the day has been watching my little one come out with new words – the latest one has been the word “mess” which he is very good at making. I have also been dealing with some issues regarding the baby’s father, but I won’t bore you with that. I am sitting here at the end of the day and going over my busy day. This is my ‘me’ time. I am focusing on my breathing and doing some meditation. My writing also brings me joy. I am doing my best to notice the little things, the moments that make up your life. My life is one long series of moments. The days go by very quickly. I want to savour those moments. I want to share that joy with my family. And to you also. We see so much despair in this world, I believe that these little moments of joy are worth holding onto. I want to send love, light and healing out to all those people who need it tonight. My heart is full. Blessings.

One little gesture at a time

Today I caught myself doing it again. I felt myself getting pulled into the drama. The drama of other people’s problems or negative behaviour. I literally catch myself in the act and tell myself off. 🙂 You cannot control what other people do and say. You can control your own actions though. I choose to focus on the positive. I will not let others emotionally blackmail me. I have had enough of that for a life time. There is a lot to be said for child like innocence. A jaded perspective is not an enviable one. I love that my little son has that child like wonder about everything. He brings me such joy. I would rather look at life as a series of moments and memories. I wake up happy and I go to bed that way because I choose to. Yes, as a parent I certainly have responsibilities and worries. We all do. But they do not control me. It is natural to have your ups and downs in life. It is like a series of waves. In the natural order of things nothing stays the same. Change is natural. The saying – Go with the flow – comes to mind here. I do try, I am a work in progress. A lovely work of art. 🙂 Hey, nothing wrong with talking myself up here. Focus the positive inwards and outwards I say. You can change the world with an attitude like that. One little gesture at a time. Love and light to you all.

All you have to do is keep your eyes and heart open

I have lived through a couple of very difficult and stressful days. On the one hand I am very grateful for what I have in life. On the other hand I now realise how precarious it all is. All it takes is for one thing to go wrong and I could find myself out on the street with my children. A very sobering thought. I have worked very hard to build a life for my family. I have a mortgage and I work two jobs to pay for it. It was my choice to take on this responsibility as I wanted my children to have a stable home and not have to move from rental to rental (which we did for years). I went back to night school to upgrade my qualifications so that I could earn better money and I have had physical ailments to deal with. I understand that the universe only gives you what you can handle, but sometimes I do think – enough now please 🙂 Any parent will tell you that you wouldn’t even think twice about taking all of this on for your family. It is what we do. Yes we all have bad days. But I choose to focus on the positive. Bad days pass, they always do. On a lighter note, my little one is starting to speak now. It really is precious to watch these memories. I feel very privileged to be his mother. I wouldn’t swap it for the world. Life is miraculous like that. You can swing from terrible to beautiful so easily, even all in one day. All you have to do is keep your eyes and heart open. Love and light to you all.