My baby turned two this month and he is a gorgeous child (hey I am his mother), and all that comes with a two year old has now emerged. That does sound ominous. He is now insisting that he does everything on his own and has no problem saying the word “No”. So he gets food and drink everywhere and I mean absolutely everywhere.
He is climbing, well everything. And with that comes the inevitable falling over. I must admit he hardly ever cries, he just keeps getting up and soldiering on. He has a wonderful personality and is always on the move. He certainly knows how to tire people out.
Today he is unwell, a high fever set in yesterday and he has thrown up a few times since then. So apart from being ‘nurse mummy’ and giving lots of kisses and cuddles, I am also administering medicine, lots of water and on clean up yuck duty. 🙂
I believe it is due to teething. His back molars are coming in and this can be quite painful at times. He may also have a slight cold. It is amazing how young children can be ill one moment and recover so quickly the next. This is my third child and so I am not panicking about the high temperature, unless it gets out of hand. He is handling things quite well and is still smiling.
He brings me no end of happiness and joy. I love the role of being a mother. However, I know that does not define me. It is only a part of who I am. An extremely important and loving part of me. It does tend to take over and I then have to put other areas of my life on hold. I do not regret this as children grow up so fast. I stayed home from work today to care for him. My family is my priority and keeping a job to take care of him is a priority also. So it is difficult at times to juggle all of it. My life is in a constant state of change, one moment of experience moves into another and I have to roll with it. So being flexible is a great tool to have. Patience is a virtue. So they say.
I want my children to know that they are loved and have a safe place to call home. I am grateful that I can provide that. I am so grateful that we are all healthy, even if we get ill and that we have food on the table and a roof over our heads. It is more than many people get to see.
Sending out love, light and healing to you all. Especially sending out loving thoughts to those in need right now.
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged baby, children, family, happiness, healing, health, home, joy, life, light, love, mother, safe, smiling
A thought struck me today – don’t you just love the English language. It didn’t actually strike me, but it certainly felt like it. Everything is temporary, everything is just borrowed. All we have is the here and now.
I make a point of not getting attached to material things. I learned that lesson when I was young. One night our family went out for New Year’s Eve and when we got home we found that our home had been ransacked. They not only robbed us but drank our alcohol, and touched everything in the house. They even went through my underwear drawer. It was a violation of my privacy and they took anything of value that we had at the time. It was a lesson learned. You can replace jewellery, but you cannot replace a loved one.
You cannot replace the relationships that you build up over a lifetime. Those memories are to be treasured when you are alive on this planet. We cannot take any material item with us, so what is the point of coveting them when you are here. Material items do not make you happy.
They say time is fleeting. Everyone thinks that they have all the time in world to fix things that aren’t right within their lives. But that is just a fallacy. Life is short. It is but a blip on the radar. Do you want your life to be lived or do you just wish to exist and wait for the inevitable? For in the end we all pass on. I want my children to know that they are loved. I want those close to me to know that my time on earth was not wasted. I want to make a difference. I want to touch people’s lives in a positive way. When the end is near, I do not want to look back on my life with regret. I want to be surrounded by those people that I have connected with. That connection is what is important. WE are all connected. Material things can never replace that. Love is everything.
Sitting in front of the computer tonight listening to the wind howling outside. It is strong enough to rattle the window panes. Makes it kind of hard to think straight. I have made some major life changes recently and I have to say that it is as messy as I thought it would be. My emotions have been up and down like a roller coaster ride. But at least I am feeling them. They come, I feel them and then they pass. There were many years of my young life where I felt nothing at all just so I could survive each day. Nothing is forever. The changes are necessary. One of my new years resolutions was to remove people from my life that were negative, holding me back or just plain disrespecting or hurting me. Needless to say this is causing major upheavals in my life as some of those people are family. You don’t get to choose your family, but you do get to choose if you want to hang with them. It is sad. But it is necessary.
I am a good person and I am following my own spiritual path. This path is one where I can connect with others in a positive way. Spread the love so to speak 🙂 The recordings that I hear over and over from my youth are starting to fade. I am worthy. I am loved. Tonight I am sending out love, light and healing to all those people who need it. Blessings.
Which path do you choose? Do you have a choice? Do you believe that you have a choice?
I have been thinking about this lately as I am finding many people in my life that are showing up and pushing this into my face. (Well it certainly feels like it anyway). There are many people who I notice live in denial land. They are quite happy not to see the reality or to blame someone or something else for their lot in life. They prefer to not have to deal with the consequences of their actions. This would be ok if the consequences only affected them. But sadly this is not the case in the real world. In the real world people get hurt at the hands of those that do not see or do not wish to see. You usually would say that these people are selfish and show no empathy towards others. They ride rough shod over others feelings and move onto the next victim. We all know someone like that. They act like they know what empathy is. They know what it looks like in others. But they prefer to manipulate to get what they want because that is more important to them. Is this because they have no choice, no control over their actions? I always thought that everyone had a choice. But I am finding that it is hard for me to believe that someone would live that way willingly. To lurch from one drama to the next, over and over again. It sounds like torture to me. To feel that you have to justify your actions to everyone all the time would just be exhausting.
How do you deal with it? This would depend on your own coping skills. It would also depend on who that person is in your life. You know the old adage “You can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family”. It is easy to avoid a non-family member, but what if it is your immediate family? Do you cut them out of your life or do you find a way to be civil? Do you cope with the toxic family relationships because you know that to break away would invite a barrage of drama (and by this I mean emotional blackmail – you know master manipulators) by the others to bring you back into line to play the role that you have always played? I find it quite interesting how someone can take such awful behaviour from family because it is what they are used to, even if logically you know it is wrong, you still catch yourself falling into old behaviour patterns.
Choosing to follow a different path will invite resistance and sometimes pain. Here is another gem – It is a sign of insanity to repeat the same thing over and over again and expect a different outcome. You come to a point in life where you have no option but to change. You have every right to feel safe in your own home. You do not have to accept these behaviours just because it has always been that way. We all have that inner strength to change our lives for the better. You just have to believe it.
Life is about living – not surviving, waiting, expecting, wishing or hoping to be happy.
Be aware that you have a choice. You can decide to avoid people who influence your life in a negative way. Surround yourself with those spirits that see the real you and accept you for who you are. Understand that to focus on the past, the negative patterns and the pain stops you from living in the here and now. Shine your light into this world, it is what you were put on this earth for. Do not let anyone stand in your way. You come from love. You are loved every day of your life. Do not end up on your death bed full of regret about a chance that was lost.
You may be thinking – easier said than done and that is so true. The spiritual path that you choose to walk upon is yours and yours alone. Let it be about positive and happy thoughts. Love.
I have been absent from the blogesphere for a while. I have been dealing with a personal crisis that has subsided for now anyway. One thing I have noticed is how life goes on – no matter what is happening around you. I still had to look after the family. I still had to work two jobs. I had to contend with the everyday running of the household. I had to put up a front to my children as I did not want to worry them. I lost sleep. I became ill as I was run down. But life still had to go on. How many of us do this everyday? It helped knowing that my problems were not so bad and that there are others dealing with much more than I – this put things into perspective. It helped to know that this will pass and things will get better. I know that. Meditation has become all the more important as I contend with a crook neck due to the stress. I have been trying to focus on the children and the joy that they can bring. I have been spending time with my family and friends. But something had to give and that was my writing. It is very difficult to get into the right head space to be creative when you are feeling overwhelmed with life. I am back. How I miss using my creative outlet. It feels like I have lost a part of me when I am away.
My little boy is nearly two and I have been really enjoying watching him learn to speak. He certainly knows how to make himself understood even if he doesn’t know all the words yet 🙂 My eldest is learning how to drive – what fun that is. The kids are on school holidays so there goes any assemblance of routine for two weeks 🙂 I am just so happy that we are all together, happy and healthy. What more can I ask for. I am so grateful. My house is certainly lived in and life is not perfect – I wouldn’t have it any other way. Sending out love and light to everyone.
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged children, family, happy, healthy, joy, life, light, love, meditation, sleep, stress
For all of those single mothers out there, in fact for every parent out there…..This is a message for you. Remember to take the time that you need to take care of yourself. We are so used to putting everyone else first that we often forget about our needs. Don’t let it go. What is the point of getting run down and becoming ill, that leads to being unable to take of your family. I have had a big reminder of this lately and tonight I am sending out love, light and healing to all those people who need it right now. We are people too and we do not have super powers. Although sometimes we wish we did 🙂
It is amazing what you can fit into one day. Albeit my only day off. But as a mother you don’t get any time off 🙂 Dropped one child off to school, attended some appointments and then took my baby to swimming lessons. It is only his third one, but he is already so confident he wants to go off without me. It brings me so much joy to share this experience with him. Then it was home for lunch and a nap – for the baby, not me! The little prince decided to remove his nappy and relieved himself all over his cot. Oh the joys of motherhood. Had to strip the bed and wash everything. Then two more appointments all with baby in tow. So many times that I had to pull the stroller out of the car and put it back in and the baby too. I am getting muscles on my muscles 🙂 Then off home to put dinner on. Followed by bath time. Playing with blocks and chatting with my little boy before I put him to bed. One of the highlights of the day has been watching my little one come out with new words – the latest one has been the word “mess” which he is very good at making. I have also been dealing with some issues regarding the baby’s father, but I won’t bore you with that. I am sitting here at the end of the day and going over my busy day. This is my ‘me’ time. I am focusing on my breathing and doing some meditation. My writing also brings me joy. I am doing my best to notice the little things, the moments that make up your life. My life is one long series of moments. The days go by very quickly. I want to savour those moments. I want to share that joy with my family. And to you also. We see so much despair in this world, I believe that these little moments of joy are worth holding onto. I want to send love, light and healing out to all those people who need it tonight. My heart is full. Blessings.
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged baby, family, healing, heart, home, joy, light, love, meditation, mother, writing